Coach vs. Therapist vs. Mentor. Who Do You Need?
We're tackling a question I always get: "How do I know if I need a coach, a therapist, or a mentor?"
Whether you're feeling stuck, seeking transformation, or just looking for some clarity, it's crucial to know which support system is best for where you’re at in life.
Coaching and therapy usually involve a large financial commitment. Here is a breakdown of which support system would be best for you.
I have worked with many different therapists and coaches. I was able to overcome PTSD with the guidance of a therapist and I wholeheartedly believe therapy is an amazing and essential support, especially if there is trauma involved. I have built a thriving business and found an amazing career with the help of a coach. Both of them play a huge role in my life and my support system.
However, sometimes, people can get locked in “victim looping” with therapists, where all they do is talk about their problems and never move forward. I’ve had multiple clients come to me and say, “I’ve been working with my therapist for years. I’m very aware that I am a people-pleaser and exhausted because I can’t say no at work, yet I’m not doing anything about it.”
This is where coaching and therapy differ. A coach will help you move forward, not just bring awareness.
The Difference Between a Coach, Therapist, and Mentor
1. Coaching: The Accelerator
Coaching is all about action and moving forward in your life. Coaching, at its core, is future-focused. It helps you create the career you want and gives you the ability to win both at work and at home.
Most people come to me for a few reasons:
They are high performers but exhausted and don’t feel like they’re winning at work or at home
They are high performers who are directionless in their career and know something needs to change, but not sure what to do
They are high performers suffering with procrastination, anger outbursts, or have gone through a huge life event (divorce, having a child, starting a business) and want to be the best version of themselves but often feel out of control
As a coach, I then work with them on these areas to help them achieve their big f*cking dreams (see what I did there?).
The Mecca and gold-star of a coach is one who is trained in therapeutic methods as well as coaching techniques, so they can uncover why you’re not getting to win at work and at home and then help you move forward.
I trained in Internal Family Systems Therapy (IFS) because I wanted methods to work with a client’s subconscious and move them forward, without getting lost in endless victim cycles.
Often, coaches will have industry-specific experience. In my coaching practice, I’m a life coach but often do career coaching and executive coaching given my background in tech and leadership. A coach will often have achieved career goals that you want to achieve, though it’s not always necessary.
Coaching Pros:
Acceleration in your career, relationships, and self-esteem.
Tactical strategies that can make a huge impact on your life and career.
Proven track record of transformation.
Focuses on actionable steps and future-oriented strategies.
Great for those who are ready to make changes and take action.
Coaching Cons:
Unregulated industry; anyone can call themselves a coach. Look for a coach with a reputable certification. An ICF Certification is the gold-standard globally for coaching.
May not address deep-seated issues or traumas.
2. Therapy: The Stabilizer
Therapy dives deep into healing past traumas and stabilizing your mental health. It's the go-to for addressing serious issues like abuse, addiction, or mental health disorders. If you are currently experiencing any type of Big T trauma like abuse, addiction, or severe depression and anxiety, and want those to be the primary focus of your healing, then that should be worked on with a therapist.
However, many people who have big T traumas work with both a coach and a therapist, and I’ve worked with clients who have histories of eating disorders or toxic relationships. This doesn’t mean that they can’t work with a coach, but that the primary coaching engagement shouldn’t be about overcoming these topics.
Therapy Pros:
Provides a safe space to heal from past traumas.
Licensed professionals with extensive training.
Focuses on mental health and emotional well-being.
Therapy Cons:
Can be slower in terms of action and progress.
Sometimes keeps you in a loop of self-awareness without action.
3. Mentorship: The Skill Builder
Mentors are like the wise sages of the career and personal development world. They’ve been there, done that, and can show you the ropes. Unlike coaches, mentors are typically more hands-on, providing guidance and advice based on their own experiences. Whether you're looking to climb the corporate ladder or launch your own business, a mentor can provide invaluable insight and practical advice.
Mentorship Pros:
Offers real-world experience and practical advice.
Helps bridge the skills gap and provides industry-specific guidance.
Can be a great networking opportunity.
Mentorship Cons: